Get to know who you are
The idea of who we are, how we behave, and why we behave in specific ways, have always intrigued me. This curiosity lead to my focus and research on identity, which started early in my academic career. This focus continued also in my private business, becoming an inseparable aspect within the work that I do. I truly believe that you first need to look after yourself, before you can effectively attend to others; for some people this may seem selfish, but for me it is crucial, one of the important life lessons that came into my awareness. It reminds me of the flight attendant who demonstrates that adults first need to put the oxygen masks on their own faces before attending to the children. If you are not okay, you may not be okay to attend to others. I am not specifically talking about the coaching or therapeutic environments, I am talking about life in general.
It starts with stillness
There may be many ways to care for yourself; for me stillness is one of the greatest vehicles to get there. Trust me, it has never been something that came natural to me – becoming still – it still isn’t. I am highly analytical and creative, with a brain that is constantly on the run, scavenging for ways to go about with the never-ending information. Even during holidays I used to get restless, not being able to be still, to relax. However, I have learned that silence is indeed golden. It is in the stillness that we can connect with our spirit and that our spirit can connect with God. We need stillness to hear. In this polarity lies great power, to be able to switch off my mind from the hectic world, regaining balance, and becoming focused. After such stillness I am usually more aware of who I am, what I like, where I do not want to be, and where I am actually going to. It is not always easy for me, but I have made a daily date with myself to be still for a few minutes. This is just the first step of being more kind to myself, to allow myself to rest, to connect, and not to become a victim of my surroundings with excuses that I am too busy for the self-care that I proclaim others must follow.
If we do not look after ourselves, we may get to a place where we also may not be able to care for others. We may become so busy and overpowered by daily life and responsibilities, that we may lose our zest for life, lose our interest and passion, become zombies, and eventually fall victim to burn-out or other ‘diseases’ of our time.
Coaching and stillness
Coaching for me is an opportunity for clients to become aware of their inner conflicts that prevent them from reaching their potential. Coaching is about breaking negative feelings and beliefs that have been configured within specific circumstances or over a period of time. It is about the realization that you are actually amazing. The process guides you to think differently about yourself and about others. It shows you that others do not have the power over you. You decide how to react, you hold the key to unlock the door to greatness. Coaching is not always about dialogue, it is also about stillness. In stillness we anchor ourselves. In stillness creativity is born, we become without planning, we are without thinking. We move forward by being still. Our life scripts are being written without words.
May I simply say what a relief to uncover somebody that really understands what theyre discussing over the internet. You certainly know how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More and more people really need to check this out and understand this side of the story. I was surprised that youre not more popular because you certainly have the gift.
Thank you so much